Oh Internet,
Remember when I said I was bad at keeping up this blog? I think now you believe me. Looking back, I see it's been more than 8 months since my last post; I also see I have a tendency to address the Internet in apostrophe. Sorry, I'll try to work on that.
So, where to start? Tonight is Thanksgiving Eve, and tomorrow is one of my favorite holidays of the year. Some of you may know that I was born on Thanksgiving, so to me it's a holiday with family, togetherness, a big fat meal, and I get presents. In a word, it's turiffic (I meant that as a turkey pun, man I'm rusty). This year, my birthday falls a mere 3 days after T-day, and I'm turning the big 2-5. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't nervous about it, but I'm mostly looking forward to it. The fear:excitement ratio is about on par with a roller coaster ramp-up. I do like roller coasters, but the time in line beforehand is a-gon-y.
This is the time of year where most people reflect on what they're thankful for in their lives. I'm of course thankful for the wonderful people, the friends and family in my life, but I would hope that I show that all year round. And if I don't, then I'm thankful that these people let me hang around anyway. For whatever apprehension I have about turning 25, I'm looking forward to spending the next few days with the people I care about.
kthxgivingbye!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Thursday, March 4, 2010
Viva Jay Sherman, Viva Quebec.
Dear Internet,
Today, I appeal to you to ask a favor. I need your help to realize my new goal in life; and yes, I know I'm the girl who cried "new goal in life," but this one is for real, pinky swear. I want to find out who this is:
My immediate reaction to this picture was "I would marry this man." Allow me to explain my thought process:
1) He has tattoos. A shallow qualification but, generally speaking, I dig it.
2) He not only likes one of my favorite, albeit fairly forgotten 90s cartoons, but likes it enough have it indelibly drawn on his person.
3) He went for the meta-joke of putting this on his armpit. Which means he clearly put a lot of thought into this.
Honestly, that's about all it takes. I'm around 98% serious that I would marry this dude based on this picture alone. Because if there's one thing I love more than making bad decisions, it's making bad decisions based on things I see in the fail blog vein of the internet. Besides, I have a practice marriage to get out of the way if I'm going to keep up the family tradition.
So please, keep an eye out, and spread the word! I know the opportunity to scrutinize someone else's pit is a rare, weird, and somewhat gross prospect, but all I need is a name to go with the lower-half-of-the-face. If this doesn't work I will have to resort to the likes of Maury, and no one wants that.
sidenote: today is day 30 of me being smoke-free.
Today, I appeal to you to ask a favor. I need your help to realize my new goal in life; and yes, I know I'm the girl who cried "new goal in life," but this one is for real, pinky swear. I want to find out who this is:
My immediate reaction to this picture was "I would marry this man." Allow me to explain my thought process:
1) He has tattoos. A shallow qualification but, generally speaking, I dig it.
2) He not only likes one of my favorite, albeit fairly forgotten 90s cartoons, but likes it enough have it indelibly drawn on his person.
3) He went for the meta-joke of putting this on his armpit. Which means he clearly put a lot of thought into this.
Honestly, that's about all it takes. I'm around 98% serious that I would marry this dude based on this picture alone. Because if there's one thing I love more than making bad decisions, it's making bad decisions based on things I see in the fail blog vein of the internet. Besides, I have a practice marriage to get out of the way if I'm going to keep up the family tradition.
So please, keep an eye out, and spread the word! I know the opportunity to scrutinize someone else's pit is a rare, weird, and somewhat gross prospect, but all I need is a name to go with the lower-half-of-the-face. If this doesn't work I will have to resort to the likes of Maury, and no one wants that.
sidenote: today is day 30 of me being smoke-free.
Monday, February 22, 2010
Or as they say down south, "soy una CHAMP"
So! How's it going? Well, I'm trying this new thing where I am less sedentary and I, what do you call it... do... things? Bear with me, it's all so new.
The biggest thing I'm doing I suppose would be the half-marathon training program, which would be running. A lot of running. We've only done one session so far but I feel pretty safe in saying there will be a lot more running involved. Let me clarify something here: I hate running. You know "I love you like a fat kid loves cake?" Well that fat kid is me, and I love cake as much as I hate running. But hating my life for half an hour twice a week is better than eating pop tarts in bed* and being blasé about life all the time. I've even gone running by myself outside of the training program! Okay, only once, but seeing as there's only been one training run so far I am doubling my running. This is because I am a champ.
Yup, that's about it! Oh yeah, and tomorrow makes 3 weeks without a cigarette (again, champ).
*not that I've ever done that. Ever. And if you tell anyone I have I will deny it SO hard.
The biggest thing I'm doing I suppose would be the half-marathon training program, which would be running. A lot of running. We've only done one session so far but I feel pretty safe in saying there will be a lot more running involved. Let me clarify something here: I hate running. You know "I love you like a fat kid loves cake?" Well that fat kid is me, and I love cake as much as I hate running. But hating my life for half an hour twice a week is better than eating pop tarts in bed* and being blasé about life all the time. I've even gone running by myself outside of the training program! Okay, only once, but seeing as there's only been one training run so far I am doubling my running. This is because I am a champ.
Yup, that's about it! Oh yeah, and tomorrow makes 3 weeks without a cigarette (again, champ).
*not that I've ever done that. Ever. And if you tell anyone I have I will deny it SO hard.
Wednesday, February 3, 2010
I'm a quitter, how do you like me now?
Today at 4pm marked 24 hours of yours truly being cigarette-free!
Granted, 24 hours is not very long, especially since I was asleep for about 7 of them, but it's the longest I've gone without smoking for 5 years. And when you consider that I didn't have my usual leaving-work cigarette, my just-woke-up cigarette, or my smoke-break-with-Jerry cigarette, I think I'm doing alright! And if I can quit smoking, then I don't have to stress about how I'll survive long meetings, feel like a jerk when I pass kids on the street, or worry about looking like this when I'm 30.
So, any advice? My plan so far includes taking Chantix, and probably annoying the good folks at 1-800-QUIT-NOW ("I don't need to smoke, but I want to smoke, wahhh"). But any other tips are welcome!
Granted, 24 hours is not very long, especially since I was asleep for about 7 of them, but it's the longest I've gone without smoking for 5 years. And when you consider that I didn't have my usual leaving-work cigarette, my just-woke-up cigarette, or my smoke-break-with-Jerry cigarette, I think I'm doing alright! And if I can quit smoking, then I don't have to stress about how I'll survive long meetings, feel like a jerk when I pass kids on the street, or worry about looking like this when I'm 30.
So, any advice? My plan so far includes taking Chantix, and probably annoying the good folks at 1-800-QUIT-NOW ("I don't need to smoke, but I want to smoke, wahhh"). But any other tips are welcome!
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
B-A-N-A-N-A-S!
Occasionally, I'll realize that I have a task or errand to do that's really quite mundane. But for some reason, rather than being totally unimportant it becomes the most important thing that has ever existed. I am tormented! I can't concentrate on anything until I sew on that button, or give my dog a bath, or whatever it is.
Last night I was seized by the idea that I need new pajamas. I slipped into my current pajamas, a Christmas present from my aunt Amy, and was overcome with shame. Amy's equally embarrassing past gifts include crocs and a pink snuggie. I couldn't believe I had gone so long wearing such embarrassing pjs; mind you that no one ever sees me in my pajamas, save for my gay neighbors when I am too hungover to change before I take the dog out in the yard. I think we're forgetting the point, which is PINK FLANNEL SOCK MONKEYS, PEOPLE!
The sock monkeys participating in various leisure activities has finally become too much for me to bear... or monkey. No, let's stick with bear. Here's hoping I can, at 24 years old, upgrade to the realm of suitable sleepwear.
Last night I was seized by the idea that I need new pajamas. I slipped into my current pajamas, a Christmas present from my aunt Amy, and was overcome with shame. Amy's equally embarrassing past gifts include crocs and a pink snuggie. I couldn't believe I had gone so long wearing such embarrassing pjs; mind you that no one ever sees me in my pajamas, save for my gay neighbors when I am too hungover to change before I take the dog out in the yard. I think we're forgetting the point, which is PINK FLANNEL SOCK MONKEYS, PEOPLE!
The sock monkeys participating in various leisure activities has finally become too much for me to bear... or monkey. No, let's stick with bear. Here's hoping I can, at 24 years old, upgrade to the realm of suitable sleepwear.
Thursday, January 14, 2010
An A.D.D. Singularity
I don't know what is with me today, but I have the shortest attention span. My inability to focus is so great that I'm worried my brain has astigmatism. So with that in mind, I bring you a list of things I have been distracted by today:
-luxury wafers
-trying to find the world's cutest puppy
-First Person Tetris
-A Softer World
-this blog
-that blog
-plus size models: the next big trend, or just fat chicks?
-Little Jersey Shore
-the circumstances of Grigori Rasputin's death, and also his sex life
-many incarnations of Scrabble
I can't even focus enough to think of all the other things that have distracted me today! This about sums it up:
Remember Clone High? No one ever does.
-luxury wafers
-trying to find the world's cutest puppy
-First Person Tetris
-A Softer World
-this blog
-that blog
-plus size models: the next big trend, or just fat chicks?
-Little Jersey Shore
-the circumstances of Grigori Rasputin's death, and also his sex life
-many incarnations of Scrabble
I can't even focus enough to think of all the other things that have distracted me today! This about sums it up:
Remember Clone High? No one ever does.
Friday, January 8, 2010
Mo-mo-momonga!
My new dream in life is to own a momonga:
Look at that thing! It may actually be the most genetically perfect animal in the world, if cuteness is the only qualification. It's like god smushed together a pug and a squirrel and wrapped the whole thing in cotton candy and baby laughter. If anyone knows where I can get my hands on momongas, I'll pick one up for you too. And if anyone knows whether or not they're illegal in the U.S., save it, I don't care.
Look at that thing! It may actually be the most genetically perfect animal in the world, if cuteness is the only qualification. It's like god smushed together a pug and a squirrel and wrapped the whole thing in cotton candy and baby laughter. If anyone knows where I can get my hands on momongas, I'll pick one up for you too. And if anyone knows whether or not they're illegal in the U.S., save it, I don't care.
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